Appearance with Russell Harty on his TV chat show, talking about The Boys in Blue and their career generally.
Episode aired Thursday 24th March 1983
Russell: Swansea isn’t the only town that’s been celebrating a heroes welcome this week. We had our own party here in Manchester last night. Out came the red carpet for the world premiere of Cannon and Balls first film called The Boys in Blue and stars from the worlds of film, television and sport were there to welcome them.
(Plays The Boys in Blue theme song)
Russell: Ladies and gentlemen, The Boys in Blue, Mr Cannon. Mr Ball.
(Cannon and Ball enter)
Bobby: Thank you
Russell: Now then, in order that we may clarify something for the nation which is Cannon and which is Ball.
Tommy. (Pointing at Bobby) That’s Cannon and this is Ball
Bobby: No
Tommy: Pardon
Bobby: I’m Ball.
Tommy: That’s what I said
Russell: That’s right, so you’re, you’re the… which one of you is the sex symbol.
Tommy: Bobby
Russell: In which case, why are you always going for him?
Tommy: What do you mean? Well I’ve got to control him haven’t I?
Bobby: No, he’s right Tom, I must be honest you are picking on me always.
Tommy: It’s them. That’s what does it – them. Them stupid bloody desert boots he wears.
Bobby: Shut up.
Russell: Is there a part of him, excluding the desert boots, that you’re jealous of? You keep picking on him and hitting him the whole time. What makes you so superior?
Tommy: What makes me so superior?
Bobby: That he’s jealous I’m a sex object.
Tommy: What do you mean a sex object.
Bobby: When I want sex they object
Tommy: That’s true.
Bobby: Ohh hasn’t he got long eyelashes for a boy
Russell: Me I’ve got…
Tommy: Funny isn’t it, eh, funny how he never got married?
Russell: Listen, last night.
Bobby: I must tell you this, last night Russell was very drunk. Go on Russell
Russell: I was not very drunk
Tommy: You was
Russell: At the end of the evening, I may have been.
Tommy: That’s better
Russell: Thank you very much. Last night we all went to a party to see your movie. At the premiere of your film? And we have a little piece of the action here where your two policemen, not very effective policemen, but here you are exploring each other’s possibilities.
(Clip from film plays)
Russell: Now, deep down behind these two comedians that are facing me at this moment, actually there are certain private, emotional and sentimental people. I think probably you (pointing to Tommy) are more, more emotional, sentimental than he. Am I right?
Bobby: Yes you are.
Russell: Cos I saw… this is the serious bit
Tommy: OK, right.
Bobby: Oh, this is a serious bit, OK, OK.
Russell: I saw you on This is Your Life and that seemed to be quite an emotional kind of moment for you.
Tommy: Yes it was
Bobby: Tommy cried all the way through.
Tommy: I cried all the way through it.
Russell: Did you?
Tommy: Yeah, it’s funny how you said has was more emotional than me.
Russell: And you cried all the way home.
Tommy: Yes
Bobby: Yes he did
Russell: Did your mam go to that?
Bobby: My mother? Yes, my mam went.
Russell: Was that her first time away?
Bobby: First time out of Oldham that.
Russell: What did she reckon to the rest of the world?
Bobby: She thought London were near Uganda. She’ll be watching tonight, won’t she Tom?
Tommy: She will, she’ll be watching.
Bobby: She’ll be saying ‘Eeee, look at our Robert and our Tommy.’
Tommy: She will, yeah.
Russell: And which one of you is it still goes to the local Working Mens Institute, Drinking Mens Institute.
Bobby: Me, I go to one – Sunday dinners
Russell: You do?
Bobby: Yeah.
Russell: In your Roller?
Bobby: Yes
Tommy: Yeah
Russell: Why is it important for you to have that kind of symbol? A Rolls Royce.
Tommy: Why is it? It’s not important.
Russell: Well, why didn’t you buy a Maestro like, like…
Bobby: Have you got a Rolls Royce?
Russell: Have I? (whispers something behind paper)
Bobby: What were you going to say then?
Russell: No I have not.
Tommy: Oh that’s all right then.
Bobby: Well, we got them because we wanted them. We wanted to show off.
Russell: If it were humanly possible for you to have any more fans than you’ve got, you’ve just won another 10 million. It’s quite amazing. Last night the response in the in the cinema to you because the rest of us are trying to struggle around and make ourselves fairly attractive to people, whereas you two walked in and swanned in as you as you do tonight and people are running after you. You’ve worked hard for that, haven’t you?
Tommy and Bobby: Yes
Russell: How many years?
Tommy: About 20 altogether.
Russell: And in this work in 20 years, what was what was the worst night of your life that you can recall or remember?
Bobby: The worst one was in a club in Stockton, weren’t it? And we didn’t do very well. And when we came out, we had between as a little Cortina. When we come out they were trying to turn the car over.
Tommy: Straight up, very true.
Bobby: We managed to get in and Tommy managed to kill three.
Tommy: It’s true.
Russell: Didn’t you play one night where there wasn’t single sound in the audience?
Tommy: Oh yeah, that was in Newcastle. That was at the Walker Jubilee Club. Yeah. And when we’re done, we came off and said ‘God, that’s it, we’ve died’. We’re paid off, he came and he said ‘you’ve done terrific’. I said, how do you mean? He said ‘You kept em quiet, didn’t you?’ That’s as simple as it was.
Russell: Now I can constantly see all the time there are urges to perform and to and to operate, and it would be impertinent for me to probe anymore. And so you’re clearly gonna give me a rough time if I go on any further. Meanwhile you’re gonna do a little song and dance for us, are you?
Bobby: Yeah
Tommy: Yes, gonna sing a nice song.
Russell: Heartwarming
Bobby: Do you want us to sing one?
Russell: Yes, yes we do. Cannon and Ball.
From this point they performed the trumpet sketch, with Tommy singing and Bobby accompanying on the trumpet
